Tuesday, December 21

I'm So Scared

I found out last night that my mom has breast cancer. Just typing that is so hard for me. They found a "red flag" a few years ago that she might get it eventually, but that really doesn't make it any easier. She's getting a double mastectomy next Wednesday and I'm so terrified. She's so important to me. Luckily I don't have anything to do so I'll be there for her when she's in the hospital and when she gets out. And I have plenty of knitting and reading to do while I'm waiting. It's really sweet, everyone seems to be really worried about me. One of my aunts wanted to fly here from Florida but she has taken care of so many people so my mom said she didn't need to. My dad's going to visit me in the hospital and my Grandma (on my dad's side) might stay with me some of the time cause she's in town. I guess it's nice to know that so many people care about her and about me.

I haven't cried this much in a very long time.


  1. Vicki, I'm very sorry to hear about your mother. Just know that you're in our thoughts and prayers. There is a whole group of knitters that you don't know that read your blog and will be knitting prayers for you.

  2. I stumbled upon your blog just today, and I'm so sorry for your mother and you! My grandmother who I love deeply had Stomach cancer earlier this year but luckily surgery seems to have gotten it all. Hold out hope, but do something healing.

    Maybe you should knit a shawl while you're in the hospital with her. It will be soothing to you to knit and you can pray for her or think good thoughts or whatever you believe in. Remember things that you love about her while you knit. That way your love will be knitted into it. It will either help her heal or it will give you something to remember her by if things take a bad turn (but I'm praying that they don't!).

    Good wishes and love even though you don't know me,

  3. I signed up for a blogger account just so that I could post a comment. I am so sorry that your mom has breast cancer. You are both in my prayers.
    Take Care,

  4. First, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your mother. I have worked closely with Breast Cancer Survivors and I can tell you that family support will do wonders for her and for you. Never be afraid to ask questions, demand attention for your mom after the surgery esp. with pain med, and have someone for you to talk/vent/cry to. If you need someone to talk to, post to my blog and leave your email.
    God Bless

  5. Vicki, I'm so sorry. I'll keep you, your mom, and your whole family in my thoughts.


  6. Vicki, I just got a post from you on my blog (KnitPicky: www.fiberfiend.blogspot.com)and came to read your site and found your post re: your mom.

    My thoughts and prayers are truly with you. I have a personal goal to do whatever I can to help or support efforts to stamp out this awful dratted disease. It has hit my own family more than once, and I know the terror and concern it brings into our lives.

    It seems from perusing your comments here that I'm not the only person who is more than willing to be a support tool for you! Just ask and you'll be amazed how many people will peek out from their blog lurking to be there for you!

  7. My thoughts are with you. Keep the faith and know that it's okay to freak out once in awhile. I'm sending good thoughts your way.